The Confidence Gap, Russ Harris, 2010

This book provides practical guidance on overcoming self-doubt and building true confidence through principles of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT). Harris argues that confidence isn’t about eliminating fear but rather transforming our relationship with it, focusing on values-driven actions rather than waiting for the “perfect” moment.

Top 3 Learnings:

1. Confidence comes from action, not waiting. Genuine confidence develops by taking action aligned with values, even in the presence of fear and self-doubt. Rather than eliminating negative thoughts, one should acknowledge them and still move forward.

2. Mindfulness and defusion techniques are key. Recognizing thoughts as just thoughts, rather than absolute truths, allows for detachment and enables engagement in the present moment. Techniques such as observing thoughts, labeling them, and accepting emotions without struggle help build resilience.

3. Living by values leads to sustainable confidence. Instead of focusing on outcomes or perfection, prioritizing values like authenticity, self-acceptance, and contribution leads to meaningful progress and fulfillment, reinforcing long-term confidence.